270 Reasons: Because on January 6, I Was More Afraid Working at the Capitol Than During My Entire Army Deployment to Iraq

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Because on January 6, I Was More Afraid Working at the Capitol
Than During My Entire Army Deployment to Iraq

Before I begin, I need to acknowledge the sacrifices that five officers on January 6 made on that day.

It is with honor, and a heavy heart, that I come before you to tell you my story, from painful, firsthand experience, of what happened that terrible day at the Capitol.

Even though there is overwhelming evidence to the contrary, there is a continuous and shocking attempt to ignore or try to destroy the truth of what truly happened that day, and to whitewash the facts into something other than what they unmistakably reveal: an attack on our democracy by violent domestic extremists and a stain on our history and our moral standing here at home and abroad.

When I joined the Army and Capitol Police, I took an oath to defend the Constitution. I did so with duty in my soul, and I still feel it.

To Donald Trump, I ask: Why don’t you?

On January 6, 2021, I fulfilled my oath to defend the United States Capitol and members of Congress carrying out their constitutional duties to certify the results of the November 2020 presidential election.

To be honest, I did not recognize my fellow citizens who stormed the Capitol on January 6 or the United States they claimed to represent. When I was twenty-five, and then a sergeant in the army, I had deployed to Iraq for Operation Iraqi Freedom. But on January 6, for the first time, I was more afraid working at the Capitol than during my entire army deployment to Iraq. In Iraq, we expected armed violence, because we were in a war zone. But nothing, nothing prepared me for January 6.

The verbal assaults and disrespect we endured from the rioters were bad enough. I was falsely accused of betraying my “oath” and of choosing my “paycheck” over my loyalty to the US Constitution—even as I defended the very democratic process that protected everyone in that hostile crowd. The rioters called me a “traitor,” a “disgrace,” and shouted that I (an army veteran and police officer) should be “executed.” Some of the rioters had the audacity to tell me that it was “nothing personal,” that they would “go through” us to achieve their goals. Others used more menacing language: “If you shoot us, we all have weapons, and we will shoot back,” or “We will get our guns.” “We outnumber you. Join us,” they said.

But the physical violence we experienced was horrific and devastating. My fellow officers and I were punched, pushed, kicked, shoved, sprayed with chemical irritants, and even blinded with eye-damaging lasers by a violent mob who apparently saw us law enforcement officers, dedicated, ironically, to protecting them as US citizens, as an impediment in their attempted insurrection. The mob brought hammers, rebars, knives, batons, as well as bear spray and pepper spray, to try to accomplish their insurrectionist objectives. The rioters also forcibly took our batons and shields and used them against us. I was particularly shocked at seeing the insurrectionists violently attack us with the very American flag they claimed they sought to protect.

The rioters were vicious and relentless. We found ourselves in a violent battle in a desperate attempt to prevent a breach of the Capitol Building. When I tried to help an MPD officer, I fell on top of some police shields on the ground that were slippery because of the pepper and bear spray. Rioters started to pull me by my leg, by my shield, and by the gear straps on my left shoulder. My survival instincts kicked in, and I started kicking and punching. I was finally able to hit a rioter who was grabbing me with my baton and then stand. I then continued to fend off new attackers as they kept rotating after attacking us.

What we were subjected to that day was like something from a medieval battlefield. It was a prolonged and desperate struggle. I vividly heard officers screaming in agony and pain just an arms-length from me. I, too, was being crushed by the rioters. I could feel myself losing oxygen and recall thinking to myself, “This is how I’m going to die, trampled defending this entrance.”

After order finally had been restored at the Capitol and after many exhausting hours, I arrived home at nearly 4:00 a.m. on January 7. I had to push away my wife from hugging me because of all the chemicals that covered my body. I couldn’t sleep because the chemicals reactivated after I took a shower, and my skin was still burning. I finally fell asleep two hours later, completely physically and mentally exhausted. Yet by 8:00 a.m. that day, I was already on my way back to the Capitol.

Many of my fellow Capitol Police officers, as well as MPD officers, suffered terrible physical injuries from the violence inflicted on us on January 6. I sustained injuries to both of my hands, my left shoulder, my left calf, and my right foot. I have already undergone fusion surgery on my foot, and I was just told that I need surgery on my left shoulder.

We officers risk everything to protect innocent people. President Trump summoned our attackers and incited the insurrection. He betrayed us.

But despite being outnumbered, we did our job. Every member of the House of Representatives, senator, and staff member made it home safely. Sadly, as a result of that day, we lost officers—some really good officers. But we held the line to protect our democratic process, because the alternative would have been a disaster. We are not asking for medals or even recognition. We simply want accountability and justice.

For most people, January 6 happened for a few hours that day. But for those of us who were in the thick of it, it has not ended. That day continues to be a constant trauma for us literally every day, whether because of our physical or emotional injuries, or both.

There are some who expressed outrage when someone simply kneeled for social justice during the national anthem. Where are those same people expressing outrage to condemn the violent attack on law enforcement officers, the US Capitol, and our American democracy?

On January 6, I nearly died protecting the Capitol, and I will do it again for our democracy. The way to preserve it is to elect Kamala Harris, our first female commander-in-chief.

Sergeant Aquilino Gonell is a former Capitol Police Officer, US Army veteran, and immigrant from the Dominican Republic who risked his life defending the Capitol on January 6, 2021. Since then, he has testified before Congress about his experience that day and is the author of American Shield: The Immigrant Sergeant Who Defended Democracy.

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The arguments here represent the opinion of the authors and not necessarily those of the McSweeney’s Literary Arts Fund.